This week hubby's on the late schedule at the academy. This means I am all alone just me and my thoughts every evening. (well our German Shepard is laying next to me too of course) The kids are in bed, lunches made, face washed, coffee pot ready for the morning etc. It's all done... sooooo what do I do now?? This is normally the time hubby and I catch up and talk about our day and watch our shows together. I have a few of my own shows on the DVR but caught up on those the first night. It occurs to me I need a hobby (or more TV shows to watch)... but what?!? For now it's going to be blogging(both reading and writing) and enjoying this little bit of quiet time to myself. The fact is, it's temporary. We don't know yet what his shift will be after graduation. Which by the way is now 10 weeks away!!! I finally feel like we are in the home stretch, it feels so good I am really looking forward to graduation day.
Between now and then though I do need to consider a hobby of some sort. I enjoy blogging and plan to continue, but let's be honest there's only so much I can blog about- our lives are not that interesting!! LOL
As we close week 17, I feel really good about our future in this and look forward to it even. I would say I've come a long way from the first day he came to me with this career change and applied for the job. I have ALWAYS supported him, but I was really scared and very apprehensive of what we were getting into. I am still scared, but I feel more prepared and know that he's getting the very best training there is and will continue too with this agency. He's very happy with his career change and I couldn't be happier for him.
Friday, January 25, 2013
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Focusing on the NOW
Here we are at week 17! That means only 11 more to go! While I am happy it's moving along I start to think about the job and all it has to offer both negative and positive. With all those thoughts in my head I am having to learn to take things one day at a time. A few great girlfriends gave me some good advise: don't worry so much about how things are going to be? if I can handle "the job"? how will the kids handle it? how will hubby handle it? what about the long hours? is he going to stay with this agency? if so how long? maybe we can move closer to his work? what hours will he have? I could go on all night long! ...The fact is, none of that matters right now! So I am working towards not thinking so much about the future and focus on the now. This for me is a real learning experience.
So speaking of right now; we are doing very well actually. Hubby feels good about the job and how well he's doing at the academy, as do I (most of the time). This week Hubby's hours are 2:30PM-11PM, this means he'll get home about 12:30am. I look at this as a test for the weird hours he'll have when he's a sworn officer. Tonight is the first night. It was nice this morning because he stopped in at his old job first thing(he's been wanting to stop in and say hello to the guys, plus he's kinda nosy so he's probably just itchin to know what's goin on over there) then he got to take the kids to school and stopped by my office for a short visit on his way out. Tomorrow I am off, so I am hoping to have a gym and coffee date with him before he leaves. Although me and the kids will miss him in the evenings at dinner and story time I don't think I'll mind this schedule too much. This past weekend we had a wonderful time at the beach and really spent good quality time together. I've read in other Blogs about making the most of the time when he is off and at home. We did exactly that over this holiday weekend and will again this coming weekend.
Hubby and I are both learning a lot these days and for that I am grateful. Six months is a long time, but I feel it is the necessary time to prepare a family for such a job. I look forward to graduation day when hubby, me, the kids, our families and our friends can celebrate such an accomplishment, because it has sure taken a VILLAGE to get us through these first 17 weeks.... here's to the next 11!
So speaking of right now; we are doing very well actually. Hubby feels good about the job and how well he's doing at the academy, as do I (most of the time). This week Hubby's hours are 2:30PM-11PM, this means he'll get home about 12:30am. I look at this as a test for the weird hours he'll have when he's a sworn officer. Tonight is the first night. It was nice this morning because he stopped in at his old job first thing(he's been wanting to stop in and say hello to the guys, plus he's kinda nosy so he's probably just itchin to know what's goin on over there) then he got to take the kids to school and stopped by my office for a short visit on his way out. Tomorrow I am off, so I am hoping to have a gym and coffee date with him before he leaves. Although me and the kids will miss him in the evenings at dinner and story time I don't think I'll mind this schedule too much. This past weekend we had a wonderful time at the beach and really spent good quality time together. I've read in other Blogs about making the most of the time when he is off and at home. We did exactly that over this holiday weekend and will again this coming weekend.
Hubby and I are both learning a lot these days and for that I am grateful. Six months is a long time, but I feel it is the necessary time to prepare a family for such a job. I look forward to graduation day when hubby, me, the kids, our families and our friends can celebrate such an accomplishment, because it has sure taken a VILLAGE to get us through these first 17 weeks.... here's to the next 11!
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Half Way There
This week marks week 14. This means we are half way there!! Although I feel like we should be in at least week 25 by now I am happy to say we've made it half way and feel incredibly proud of how far we've come as a couple, as individuals and as a family. Hubby passed the mid-term Monday (1/31) and was actually not so bad according to him. He was mostly stressed about his Domestic Violence Scenario that was on Wed. Which he also passed, with flying colors.
Going into this I honestly thought the 28 week academy would be manageable, fairly easy actually. It's been far from. I feel that I have grown from it though. I consider myself to be a pretty independent woman and I have proved that to be true in the last 14 weeks. I've mowed the lawn, taken on all the bills and banking, the cleaning, the kids, kids' school, dentist and doctor apt's, cooking dinner, preparing lunches, car/truck maintenance I even took down the Christmas tree and got it out of the house all by myself!! I am considering taking down the outside lights but will give it one more weekend just to see if he'll get a chance to get it done... LOL In all of this I've still managed to make it to the gym too. These are all things the Hubby would regularly help me out with and I am sure he still could from time to time but I feel it is my responsibility as a supportive academy soon-to-be-police wife to get all these things done without complaining and I look at it as practice for when he does start the actual job. HOWEVER I do loose it from time to time and he's there every time to catch me and build me back up. He brings flowers every other week or so and thanks me regularly. The kids are missing him still and that's really hard for me to see. Our girl is asking every hour after 5 when Daddy will be home and running to the window at every car she hears go by or stop. Our boy is acting up I think in part because of his age and it's normal but too he's missing Daddy. I thought by now they would be used to it, but I suppose as children it would take longer to adjust and harder to understand too. For all of their life Daddy was home at the same time every afternoon, they spent over an hour outside with him and our dog (they liked to call it "Porch Sittin with Daddy") then came in to start dinner with him. So I suppose it's ridiculous to think after only 14 weeks they'd be completely fine and used to this big change in our household. They are very excited for him to be a police officer though so we remind them that this 6 months is long, but worth it in the long run. We make the very most of our time with Hubby when he is home and available to us(he's often writing papers, studying, shinning boots and brass, ironing, washing his uniforms). TV goes off right away when he gets home, we eat dinner together, then talk or play a quick board game. Not too long after it's their bed time and he'll read a story to them. Still taking things one day at a time too. Hubby won't talk or even hear about a graduation party yet. I am just itchin to get started on that, I'm thinking, "we are half way there, when can I??!?" For now I am going to focus my party planning energy on our son's upcoming big birthday, get the Hubby through these next 14 weeks while still juggling a job, household and kids... .No worries, I got this! That's what woman/moms do right?!?
In closing of this long post I want to say this: I am thankful that Hubby comes home every night and sleeps with us. Very grateful it is a 6 month academy and not a 1 year deployment! I have huge respect and look up to military families and spouses, I just can't even imagine it. I THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE TO OUR COUNTRY! Hubby and I thank you for reading and all the wonderful support we've gotten from family, friends and strangers even. We are blessed. Here is to a New Year full of new beginnings that I am excited yet apprehensive about at the same time.
Going into this I honestly thought the 28 week academy would be manageable, fairly easy actually. It's been far from. I feel that I have grown from it though. I consider myself to be a pretty independent woman and I have proved that to be true in the last 14 weeks. I've mowed the lawn, taken on all the bills and banking, the cleaning, the kids, kids' school, dentist and doctor apt's, cooking dinner, preparing lunches, car/truck maintenance I even took down the Christmas tree and got it out of the house all by myself!! I am considering taking down the outside lights but will give it one more weekend just to see if he'll get a chance to get it done... LOL In all of this I've still managed to make it to the gym too. These are all things the Hubby would regularly help me out with and I am sure he still could from time to time but I feel it is my responsibility as a supportive academy soon-to-be-police wife to get all these things done without complaining and I look at it as practice for when he does start the actual job. HOWEVER I do loose it from time to time and he's there every time to catch me and build me back up. He brings flowers every other week or so and thanks me regularly. The kids are missing him still and that's really hard for me to see. Our girl is asking every hour after 5 when Daddy will be home and running to the window at every car she hears go by or stop. Our boy is acting up I think in part because of his age and it's normal but too he's missing Daddy. I thought by now they would be used to it, but I suppose as children it would take longer to adjust and harder to understand too. For all of their life Daddy was home at the same time every afternoon, they spent over an hour outside with him and our dog (they liked to call it "Porch Sittin with Daddy") then came in to start dinner with him. So I suppose it's ridiculous to think after only 14 weeks they'd be completely fine and used to this big change in our household. They are very excited for him to be a police officer though so we remind them that this 6 months is long, but worth it in the long run. We make the very most of our time with Hubby when he is home and available to us(he's often writing papers, studying, shinning boots and brass, ironing, washing his uniforms). TV goes off right away when he gets home, we eat dinner together, then talk or play a quick board game. Not too long after it's their bed time and he'll read a story to them. Still taking things one day at a time too. Hubby won't talk or even hear about a graduation party yet. I am just itchin to get started on that, I'm thinking, "we are half way there, when can I??!?" For now I am going to focus my party planning energy on our son's upcoming big birthday, get the Hubby through these next 14 weeks while still juggling a job, household and kids... .No worries, I got this! That's what woman/moms do right?!?
In closing of this long post I want to say this: I am thankful that Hubby comes home every night and sleeps with us. Very grateful it is a 6 month academy and not a 1 year deployment! I have huge respect and look up to military families and spouses, I just can't even imagine it. I THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE TO OUR COUNTRY! Hubby and I thank you for reading and all the wonderful support we've gotten from family, friends and strangers even. We are blessed. Here is to a New Year full of new beginnings that I am excited yet apprehensive about at the same time.
Monday, December 24, 2012
Enjoying this Holiday Season
Although I am burned out a little right now (if I am burned out, I can imagine the Hubby must definitely be burned out!) of the Academy I am enjoying every little thing and taking it all in that he's got a 8-5ish M-F shift with all Holiday's and weekends OFF right now. We picked out and decorated our tree, him and I wrapped the kid's presents together, we've went out looking at Christmas lights as a family and again with friends. Not too many plans on our weekends- just family time. For the Christmas Holiday our only plans are for dinner at Dads on Christmas Eve, stay home all day with the kids and then have dinner at my mom's on Christmas Day.
Next season will probably be drastically different! That I am not looking forward too, I can handle him working Thanksgiving and even Christmas Eve-maybe. BUT if he's working Christmas morning, that will be the toughest for me. That's my favorite time (obviously since we have small kids it's the BEST time during the Holiday season) We'll just have to get creative as to when Santa visits our home because Daddy's a police officer. As excited as our kids are for that alone I am sure they'll not even care when Santa comes. Again- one day at a time- that's a whole year from now! Any cop wives have suggestions on how you handle Christmas Morning if the Hubby is working??
Hubby's first FAIL
Week 17
Hubby had his first FAIL this week! If you ask me he got a C not an F because the percentage of the test was 76%. All tests are different but this one in particular was a 80% to pass. I didn't even believe him at first actually. He had been doing so well in scenario's and written that a FAIL hadn't even crossed my mind. All week him and I thought/stressed about it. ( he wasn't allowed to re-take until Friday) The thing is he's only allowed 3 fails and if you fail the same test twice you fail OUT OF THE ACADEMY! The good thing was he knew what he got wrong so he knew what to study for the week. But it's a bit stressful to take that second time- even if you know what you did wrong.
Well Friday morning came and I didn't hear from him (that he was on his way home, due to the fail) so I assumed he passed. By 6 that evening I finally heard from him and got the confirmation. PASS!
The stress of this stuff is crazy! To know that he could in fact fail out?? We have made such changes in our lives and have so many people rooting for us it would be devastating for him to fail out at this point in the game. As he and I both say though, one day at a time. We've got 21 weeks left. NOT EVEN HALF WAY YET!!!
Hubby had his first FAIL this week! If you ask me he got a C not an F because the percentage of the test was 76%. All tests are different but this one in particular was a 80% to pass. I didn't even believe him at first actually. He had been doing so well in scenario's and written that a FAIL hadn't even crossed my mind. All week him and I thought/stressed about it. ( he wasn't allowed to re-take until Friday) The thing is he's only allowed 3 fails and if you fail the same test twice you fail OUT OF THE ACADEMY! The good thing was he knew what he got wrong so he knew what to study for the week. But it's a bit stressful to take that second time- even if you know what you did wrong.
Well Friday morning came and I didn't hear from him (that he was on his way home, due to the fail) so I assumed he passed. By 6 that evening I finally heard from him and got the confirmation. PASS!
The stress of this stuff is crazy! To know that he could in fact fail out?? We have made such changes in our lives and have so many people rooting for us it would be devastating for him to fail out at this point in the game. As he and I both say though, one day at a time. We've got 21 weeks left. NOT EVEN HALF WAY YET!!!
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Am I cut out for this??
It's no secret that it's been a tough transition for us(it's after all the reason this blog exists). I felt though that I remained in control of my emotions, stayed positive and strong for me and the family over the last 11 weeks. Even when Hubby didn't look so good nor did he sound so good at times- I still remained very positive and always supportive. In other words, I put on my big girl panties and dealt with it!
I however seemed to have lost my "big girl no crying panties" a few days ago... I believe it started when in one of hubby's scenario tests he informed me they used a real gun with blanks in it to portray an "ambush". So that means that really happens? People really do shoot at cops? I always knew that obviously, but it didn't hit home until my Hubby was "the cops". This freaks me out. And brings me to these questions: Am I cut out to be a cops wife? Can I handle the dangers he'll be putting himself in day in and day out? I knew it was dangerous, but I don't think I ever really grasped just how dangerous it can be. I am confident he is being trained very well and will be well prepared for this dangerous job ahead(he is after all in one of the top 5 Academy's in our state). AND bottom line is- whether I feel cut out for it or not, it's happening, this is my life! I am working on putting my faith in God on this one and do my best to enjoy and make good quality time as a family when he is home.
Also, this week I became very tired of the academy and all it brings. I am tired of the 2 hour drive home for hubby, I am tired of the boot shinning, brass polishing, ironing,studying, paper writing etc.. I miss him and seeing the kids miss him is really hard. It consumes most of his time when he is actually home and I am just over it. We are not even half way yet either!!!! So I text my girlfriend; I need a pep talk, I am not in a good way right now! HELP!! But before I could meet up with the girlfriend, I spilled it all to Hubby. I don't hide my emotions or the way I feel very well, when I am bothered by something he can tell. So of course after the kids were in bed he asked me what is going on?? I completely lost control of the emotions and let him know all that I was worried about. Him and I always have good communication (15 years in the making) and it wasn't that I didn't want to share it with him, but I want to make sure I am always supportive for him. So when I am feeling down and not so positive I want to vent to one of my girls first. He listened to all I had to say and didn't say much but did hug me. (I love our hugs)
It was a good talk and I felt better after. By the time I got to hook up with the girlfriend I felt so much better. It was just a 2 day pity party, but is always nice to still fill her in and get some additional thoughts and discussion in. Also she's always good for a laugh which I really needed!!!
I however seemed to have lost my "big girl no crying panties" a few days ago... I believe it started when in one of hubby's scenario tests he informed me they used a real gun with blanks in it to portray an "ambush". So that means that really happens? People really do shoot at cops? I always knew that obviously, but it didn't hit home until my Hubby was "the cops". This freaks me out. And brings me to these questions: Am I cut out to be a cops wife? Can I handle the dangers he'll be putting himself in day in and day out? I knew it was dangerous, but I don't think I ever really grasped just how dangerous it can be. I am confident he is being trained very well and will be well prepared for this dangerous job ahead(he is after all in one of the top 5 Academy's in our state). AND bottom line is- whether I feel cut out for it or not, it's happening, this is my life! I am working on putting my faith in God on this one and do my best to enjoy and make good quality time as a family when he is home.
Also, this week I became very tired of the academy and all it brings. I am tired of the 2 hour drive home for hubby, I am tired of the boot shinning, brass polishing, ironing,studying, paper writing etc.. I miss him and seeing the kids miss him is really hard. It consumes most of his time when he is actually home and I am just over it. We are not even half way yet either!!!! So I text my girlfriend; I need a pep talk, I am not in a good way right now! HELP!! But before I could meet up with the girlfriend, I spilled it all to Hubby. I don't hide my emotions or the way I feel very well, when I am bothered by something he can tell. So of course after the kids were in bed he asked me what is going on?? I completely lost control of the emotions and let him know all that I was worried about. Him and I always have good communication (15 years in the making) and it wasn't that I didn't want to share it with him, but I want to make sure I am always supportive for him. So when I am feeling down and not so positive I want to vent to one of my girls first. He listened to all I had to say and didn't say much but did hug me. (I love our hugs)
It was a good talk and I felt better after. By the time I got to hook up with the girlfriend I felt so much better. It was just a 2 day pity party, but is always nice to still fill her in and get some additional thoughts and discussion in. Also she's always good for a laugh which I really needed!!!
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
God will only give you what you can handle
We're in week 9! I've been absent from the blog for a bit for a few reasons, one is simply I didn't have much to say. Things had really gotten better, more manageable, reasonable, less stressful, less temper tantrums from the boy, hubby was physically tired but actually in good spirits. I really feel like we're in a good spot right now. A few weeks ago we were really having a tough time adjusting (as you probably already read). Hubby was absent much of the week and when he was here he was studying, writting papers, shinning boots or plain exhausted. He had missed a few family/friend functions and missed out on some of our evening dinners which is all new for us. We missed him and he was missing us. I had always heard and some-what believed that "God will never give you more then you can handle" I now know and believe this to be true. I don't consider myself a religious person, I pray daily but am not a every weekend church go-er. Things were REALLY tough for us and with some time and prayer they just got a little easier. He has been home a few nights in time for dinner, he's adjusted to the early mornings and challenging PT so he's not so exhausted anymore. He had a few holiday's this month too which helped for family time and rest. Last night he made it in time to watch our girl sing with her class. So the saying is true- God really will not give you more then you can handle.
Another reason I haven't written in a while was becuase I was also feeling a bit self-involved-creating this blog and felt like I was complaining constantly. I am NOT a complainer nor am I a negative person. So I will be working on staying true to who I am and being positive even in tougher times. My original plan was to create a blog for getting thru the academy and soon-to-be police wifes while also updating family members along the journey too. And I hope it is just that.
Today hubby had what we call a mini-swing shift. He went in at 12:30 pm and will be off at 9:30pm. It was nice because he got to sleep in a little, take our girl to school and have coffee and breakfast with me and our boy. He then took our boy to pre-school and came home to study a bit. It was nice to spend the morning with him. He's continuing to not only pass in all the tests but excel in the class and become one of the leaders the others look up to. Him and a few others have been recognized for their accomplishments and how well they are doing. I'm sure for hubby it's a nice feeling and helps with the mental struggle a bit. I know I am so so proud of him and us.
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